When I entered 2017 I was in the mindset that this will be the best year ever, but things went downhill drastically. Life as they say ‘happened’.
On Christmas Day, myself and my mum had to call an ambulance and my nan was rushed into hospital, when she should have been enjoying Christmas with us, eating Quality Streets and tutting at how stupid EastEnders is. I’ve never seen her look so fragile and ill, the thought of anything happening to her makes my entire body go cold. We’ve always been so close and I am her ‘golden child’ as my family like to joke. Nan came out of hospital but was shortly rushed back in at the start of the New Year. She spent over a week in hospital again and is now finally back home. I am so thankful that she’s okay, that I get to spend more time with her and I go and see her as much as I possibly can. I want to take the time to say to you that it is so important that you make effort with your loved ones, spend as much time as you can with them and as cliché as it is, tell them how much you love them often.
As you can imagine, it wasn’t the best start to a brand new spanking year. The time that you want everything to run smoothly and everything has to be perfect. Things just started going so wrong, and fast as well. Everything kind of built up and I felt like I was just drowning in stress. I kept it all bottled up, like I always do, and carried on as though everything was a-okay. I got myself up in the morning, went to work, smiled all day until I got home, then I’d light a fag and just sit there with my thoughts.
I wasn’t depressed – I’d like to make that quite clear. I’ve never had depression in my life and I’m very strong minded usually. I’m that annoying person who is happy go lucky 24/7, doesn’t ever cry and is the friend who you turn to when you need cheering up or your mind taken off something. Not the girl who sits in the garden with a Marlboro light staring blankly into space.
I won’t go into everything that was getting me down as that is private. But one of the things that really knocked me is my exams that are approaching. I’m an apprentice reporter and I have a couple more journalism exams to take until I get my full qualification and damn am I shitting a brick. Because I felt down anyways everything else seemed so much worse than it was.
The reason I feel like I have to write this life update is because I want to portray how not everything you see on social media is ‘perfect’. I want my life updates to be raw and real and to capture how I feel in that moment.
I decided to make a difference and I picked myself back up. Nan was home and recovering, I started revising harder for exams and I went head first into tackling the other issues that were affecting me. Slowly things started looking up and I felt positive and happy again. I suppose the message behind this story is sometimes you just have to fight for happiness. You have to face your problems head on and deal with them. And bloody hell do I feel pretty darn epic.
Sex and relationships
I have been writing sex and relationship articles on vavaviolet now for nearly three months and I am over the moon with the feedback I have received. At first, I was kind of nervous as in a way talking about sex, blowjobs and all sorts are still rather taboo. But you guys seem to love them and always send me the sweetest messages about how entertaining and interesting you find them (which always makes my day so thank you). If there is anything, in particular, you would like me to feature please let me know by emailing email@example.com and we can have a chit chat or tweet me at @JournalistSoph. If you have a sex and relationships question and/or dilemma you can send them to me anonymously by sending them to me via https://curiouscat.me/vavaviolet
Secondly, I am in a very happy place with my love life. I wanted to give it a couple of months before I said anything about it on here (yano in case my arse got dumped again) but I do have a boyfriend now. We’ve been together nearly three months and he is VERY supportive of vavaviolet and even helps me come up with article ideas. Now I just need to train him on how to take a bomb photo so I can start doing outfit of the day posts…
Even though January was full of doom and gloom it was made a little magical because me and my boyfriend booked a trip of five days and nights to Disneyland Paris. We’re going in October via the Eurostar on October 18, and returning on October 22. On October 20, while we’re there I will be turning 21 years old so I’m overly excited about celebrating my birthday with Mickey Mouse. You’re never too old for Disney right?
We’re staying in the New York Hotel in the park so if you have stayed there before or been to the park please let me know your recommendations. I’ve already started planning and writing down everything I want to do there so recommendations would be v helpful.