Wednesday, 30 August 2017

How to ease your nerves when hooking up with guys with more sexual experience than you

Sometimes I can smell them a mile off, but often you come across them bragging on Tinder about how many back doors they’ve slammed in, how high their count is, or what they can do with their tongue piercing.

But we’re not here to chit chat about the deadness that is Tinder, I guarantee any guy on their saying ‘I’ve f*cked so many birds’ probably has no idea how to locate the clit. We’re talking about true sex gods. The ones who politely say to you something along the lines of ‘I have slept with quite a few people prior to you, is that a problem?’ I’m talking about the guy you’ve gone on a few dates with, the guys that don’t show off about it, but you know this guy has hooked up with a hell of a lot more people than you. What do we do with these guys?

Up until last year every guy I’d slept with had slept with less, or more or less the same amount of people as me. But last spring I saw an older man for a couple of months and he had slept with perhaps triple the amount of people as me. He’s been breathing a lot longer than me so obviously he had more experience, and even though I’m sexually confident I was still sh*tting a brick. I’m usually very relaxed when it comes down to getting on it, it’s like riding a bike or going swimming, but for some reason when it’s with someone with A LOT more experience than myself I freeze up.

I don’t care that they’ve shagged all the girls in their university hall or half of the people they went to school with, the emotional side of it doesn’t bother me. What bothers me is this thought ‘what if I’m his worst shag ever?’.

We always talk about ‘how to get confident’ and there are thousands of articles and books out there that will teach you how to get confident but lacking confidence in the bedroom is a very real thing that isn’t talked about enough. For me last spring stressed me the f*ck out. I went from being sexually self-assured to panicking that if I didn’t suck dick good enough I’d be ripped apart in a group chat with the lads. Now, this guy, let’s call him Paul* was very lovely and would never have done that to anyone - especially a woman - but that was my paranoia.

A year later I’ve conquered that fear and I now embrace a sexually experienced partner, because let’s be real, they know what they’re doing and the likelihood of the sex being great is very high so enjoy the moment. You don’t need to sleep with 1,000 men to gain this confidence but you do need to think of the situation in a different light.

This ladies, and gentlemen, is how to not freak out when f*cking someone with a lot of sexual experience:

1.     It’s all about your mentality on the situation. Stop thinking about how this is a negative situation and see the positives. This person might be able to teach you a few things, or show you the best time of your life. What if they’re the first person to make you orgasum? Or they end up being ‘the one’?
2.     Don’t drown in paranoia. So, what if you’re his or hers worst shag ever? Who honestly cares. If this person cares about you they will show you what they like and they will help you discover what you like in the bedroom too. They won’t go around mocking you to their friends and if they do, lets be real, they’re a dick and you can do better.
3.     Make yourself feel good. If you’re already lacking confidence because of their experience then there is no harm in upping your confidence - and no, I don’t mean go and quickly sleep around before Fred* comes over to finger you. Buy some raunchy lingerie, spritz your favourite perfume, pamper yourself, and just do what makes you feel damn good.
4.     Have the talk. This may be obvious but tell this guy/girl that you’re nervous. You never know they could be feeling the same way and it could lift both your egos.
5.     Ask him what he likes sexually. Before you get down to it ask him in a normal conversation what he likes in bed so that you can prep yourself. If he tells you he likes his balls being sucked but you’ve never placed a testicle in your mouth then you have time to do some research. But remember, you don’t have to do anything you don’t feel comfortable doing.

Written by VavaViolet’s Founder and Editor-in-Chief Sophie Blackman.


Sunday, 27 August 2017

The low down on liquid lipsticks: Where you should invest your precious time and money!

Our Beauty Editor has tried more liquid lipsticks than we've had hot dinners and she's here to give you the low down on what's good and what's sh*t.

Liquid lipsticks seem to be the number one lip product of choice circa 2015-2017. These revolutionary products combine the feel of a lipstick and the convenience of a doe foot applicator in one tube. They originally broke into the market with matte finishes, providing ultra matte finish and long wear. However, with brand innovation (especially from Kylie Cosmetics) we are now seeing more satin and silk finishes on the market. 

Undeniably Kylie Cosmetics has the most desirable and talked about array of liquid lipsticks however other considerable mentions of top market names are Kat Von D – Everlasting Liquid Lipstick, Anastasia Beverly Hills – Liquid Lipstick and of course the NYX – Soft Matte Lip Cream. 

Below are the products I've tested out for this article to see who battles it out to be the champion of liquid lipsticks!

Stila – Stay All Day Liquid Lipstick (Ricco), £16
Joeur Cosmetics – Long-wear Lip Crème Matte (Noisette), £15
Kylie Cosmetics – Lip Kit, Matte (Ginger), $29/£22
NYX – Soft Matte Lip Cream (Rome), £6


Stila Stay All Day Liquid Lipstick is not only a YouTuber favourite but tops the charts in many beauty magazines. I own a very dark, rich purple in this product. I wear it on days that I want my face to scream “don’t talk to me” or “I eat men like you for breakfast”. It’s my go to for looking scary, high fashion or just plain heartless. I chose this colour when I wanted to step out of my very safe nude/soft pink loving self to experiment with darker colours. I love the colour but here’s the real tea on the blogger favourite:

Packaging – It comes in a gold box, has a long tub, which is the average size of a liquid lipstick and overall looks sleek and professional. Stila is a brand that has gained fame perhaps over the last five years. Now all over the place at Harvey Nichols, Beauty Bay and even M&S??, it’s hard to miss this brand! Their gold packaging is always exciting to receive in the post and undoubtedly looks luxury.

Price – For £15 this is very much mid range in the market of liquid lipsticks. It's neither as cheap as Maybelline nor is it as expensive as Armani, so this is a good product to experiment with if you’ve never bought a liquid lipstick yet don’t want to buy a cheap one.

Texture – THIS PRODUCT IS SO THICK. So much so that it’s a little hard to move around the lip. This may frustrate some people like myself who like a soft sweeping application. I once tried to put this on in a moving car (last minute on
the way to the station) and it just went everywhere. WARNING: if this product goes a little bit over your desired lip line and you want to wipe it off, well, you can’t. If it smudges, you just have to deal with wonky lips, no amount of rubbing and scrubbing will get this off! My tip is to just conceal over it with a thick concealer but it still won't hide this colour. So, bottom line; the application is tough, the product is hard to move and you NEED a lipliner! There is no way, unless you have very steady hands and perfect artistry, that you can apply this neatly and accurately without the help of an outline created with lip liner. If anyone buys this colour, a good lip liner is a standard MAC one in the shade Cyber World.

Wearability/durability - Now I’m sure you’ve guessed what’s coming just from the description of how thick this product is. It crumbles!! Yes, it goes super dry like the Sahara desert and just crumbles. You’ll find weird thick flakes of liquid lipstick on everything all of a sudden, you’ll touch your lips and they’ll feel like dried cement! Do not eat oily foods because this product will not gracefully come off, chunks will stick to the dry part of your lips while the oil just wipes away small parts. Of course, a re-application will be necessary but you will have to reapply over your already dry and crumbly lips. However, if you do not eat oily anything and don’t mind the dryness, this WILL last all day. BUT that’s not realistic. I wore this for fashion week one-day last year. I was at lunch and I had a drink with a straw, each time I drank from the straw, this lipstick left a whole chunky residue on my straw! My friend looked at my drink and said it looked like something was growing on it. At least a centimetre of the product had collected on my straw and trust me, it wasn’t pretty. So far: avoid nice food, straws and coffee cups. Taking this product off is another chore in itself, you will have to scrub and scrub but it’ll leave a creepy residue all over your lips. Maybe I should use an oil cleanser, but I really don’t want to fork out any more money for this.

Value for money – As said earlier, this isn’t a product that you’d consider a splurge in terms of other liquid lipsticks on the market, however; it’s not cheap. For the discomfort and fuss, it causes my verdict is that it is not worth the price it charges. I also should consider that I had to buy a lip liner for this, which added around £15 extra to the cost of wearing this product, so essentially getting me up the £30 mark. I was better off getting a Kylie Lip Kit.

The judgement: 1/5, do not recommend, will not repurchase (EVER.)


Now I’ll be honest here and say this wasn’t my own find! I found this on a YouTube video by Laura Lee who said she swears by this liquid lipstick and absolutely loves it. She owns the colour Noisette, and shortly after, I became an owner of a Noisette Jouer liquid lipstick myself. I should honestly stop watching these videos, I have no control! Noisette is a typical nudey-pink shade; soft, feminine, goes with anything and a classic. It’s also very instagrammble! I ordered this off Cult Beauty when they had an offer on Jouer cosmetics as brand of the month. 

Packaging – Picture this; I’m sat in my pyjamas with my coffee, eagerly awaiting my parcel from Cult Beauty, bursting with excitement and imagining ALL the looks I’m going to try with this Laura Lee approved gem. The doorbell goes off, I frantically collect my parcel, and I rip it apart and go through layers of tissue paper and my jaw drops. I was completely shook. This £15 product was TINY. The box for this is minuscule, almost like travel mini version of an average liquid lipstick. Initially, this really annoyed me! I had paid a lot for such a little product and I did not expect this. Regardless, the little gold box is cute and the actual tube looks high end. It is a squared long tube with a tiny lid. If you're a clumsy person you may find application tough with this tiny applicator.

Price – We are mid-range here again however the product is very small, I’d say this is only a little bit more product than a NYX Soft Matte Lip Crème which is perhaps a third of the price.

Texture – This is where the product redeemed itself. The texture is dreamy. I was in complete heaven when I swiped this across my lip; it glided on smoothly and lightly yet covered my lip to perfection. I could even hear a little harp playing while I applied this in the back of my head. Trust me when I say this, you need one coat and nothing else. You won't need a lip liner because the applicator is very small (unlike Stila which was large and heavier). It's a very light applicator, which has a fine head so you can easily trace every line of your lip without a lip liner. I, however, do use one, as I like to make my lips look bigger. I use Spice by Mac. My honest verdict, however, is that you do not need to invest in a lip liner for this beautiful product.

Wearability/durability – Trust me, it gets better. When this product is on, you feel zero discomfort or even know that it's on your lip. With the Stila one, you can feel the very heavy formula weighing down your lips and crumbling away. It is light and just feels like your lips would with no product. For anyone that knows me, they know my go to nude is MAC Viva Glam 2 BUT I’m shocked to say it has been replaced by Noisette. So, I’ve stepped out the door with my new favourite product, I look in the mirror hours later after two drinks and it’s not budged nor has it transferred onto the straw I’ve been drinking from. I proceed to eat a meal and go back to my mirror, NOTHING HAS CHANGED! I can wear this (and have) all day at work, a day out or a night out and not top up even after eating or drinking (haven’t tried kissing yet) and this thing will not budge. I was sceptical after finding out how light and smooth it was because I assumed it would just not stay but it proved me oh so wrong.
Taking this product off requires just one swipe with micellar water or a wipe. It leaves no residue.

Value for money – The initial disappointment for the size of this product has been redeemed in two ways: how great the product is and how easy the bottle is to fit inside a tiny clutch purse. It really is worth the money you pay for and may even be my favourite lip product till date. For me, a traditional lipstick preacher, this is a very big statement to make. I didn’t invest in liquid lipsticks for at least a year after they became big because I was hell bent on advocating traditional lipsticks. However, I may have converted, but only for this product so far! By the looks of how little product is needed per application, it looks as if this will last me a long time.

The judgement: 5/5 (yes really!), would recommend to anyone, will repurchase and buy more colours!

Kylie Cosmetics

I know you were all waiting for this one at the edge of your seats. The Holy Grail, the mother of all liquid lipsticks; the lip kit. Note: you can buy the liquid lipsticks on their own without the liner but I wanted the OG of Kylie Cosmetics, the whole kit. The shade I have is ginger, a nice brown nude, goes with most dark eye looks and brown ones too. I’m looking forward to wearing this a lot in autumn while sipping a pumpkin spiced latte. Anyway on the review...

Packaging – When you see these boxes on Kylie’s Snapchat, they give an accurate representation of its size and look. I was a little surprised at how light it was though. It’s a glossy box that has the liner and lipstick in separate dividers. The lipstick is in a long tube, standard shape and has her standard logo all over it. Overall, it’s just standard packaging.

Price – This product is inevitably at the dearer end of the spectrum. However, of course, cheaper when bought without the lip liner. For a high-end makeup lover, £22 is very reasonable for both a liquid lipstick and liner. So I wasn’t too fussed. The shipping and customs, though, was what annoyed me. I don’t remember the exact figure but expect to be rocking out at least £15 more for the extra costs of importing it. It’s a lot of product and it looks like it’ll last me a long time.

Texture – My friend bought one at the same time as me and she texted me in full capitals saying “OMG THE FORMULA IS AMAZING, I DIDN’T WANT TO LIKE IT BUT I SO DO”. Shortly after, I’ve lined my lips and I’m tingling with excitement to give my lips the first swipe of perhaps the most quickly sold out product of this past century. One swipe in I’m making “ooh” and “ah” noises, it’s a perfectly smooth application and only requires one coat. It dries very quickly so you can be out the door immediately. Once dried, it feels dry and stuck on but not tight and crumbly. The application is quick and easy. I would struggle to get it neatly on around my cupids bow without the liner though.

Wearability/durability – This product DOES NOT budge! You can eat all you want, drink all you want (shot back as many tequilas as you want AND suck the lemon) and it still will not rub off. It also does not flake and go dry. Therefore, no crumbly finish, no straw residue and no constant touch ups. This will stay on all day and will look perfectly matte! You may drink all the coffee you want and it won't end up disappearing. I was so impressed with this formula, what could possibly be in it?? The only downside to this product is removal. It takes me more than a whole cotton pad and loads of micellar water to just get it to wipe off a little. I took off my entire make up and washed my face with cleanser and it still looks intact. So much so that I could leave my house with it! My friend advised me to use an oil cleanser but once again I do not want to fork out more money for a new cleanser just to take off a lipstick.

Value for money – When you get over shipping and customs costs, this product really is a steal for just £22 you get two products that work perfectly together. You can also use this lip liner for other lipsticks. I personally think it was money well spent and I will definitely purchase other shades. Maybe I’ll even venture into her other products such as Kyshadows and Kylighters. I’m a fan! Next time, maybe I’ll order more products to get free shipping if it bugs me too much.

The judgement – 4/5 (takes too much effort to take off, hassle to ship in makes it lose one point), would definitely recommend and will 100% purchase again.


NYX Soft Matte Lip Cream was the first liquid lipstick I ever owned. I go way back with these! I had hunted them down way before any and everywhere was selling them. I had to buy them off American websites way before they were sold at Boots or Selfridges. Back then they only had about six colours! This is a standard favourite of YouTubers, bloggers and my friends. Everyone adores these minuscule and convenient little wonders. This is by far the cheapest liquid lipstick I have seen worth trying and is a good one to try different colours you’re not sure about with since you won't feel bad about wasting money. I own Cannes, London and Rome. However, since I’ve spoken about two nudes already I’ll focus on Rome. Rome is a beautiful shade that I love to wear in professional settings or when I have simple neutral shades on my eyes. It just makes any look classy and sophisticated. I love this shade and I know it’ll always up the charm for any makeup look that’s simple.

Packaging – Nothing fancy here, just the tube with a plastic seal around it. Not much can be expected in terms of packaging from a product so cheap. The applicator is much shorter than Stila or Kylie’s and the head is smaller too. It allows for an accurate trace of your own natural lip line.

Texture – Now this is really when you realise the truth of the saying “you get what you pay for”. The texture of this is thick yet lacks pigment. It needs more than one coat, I often find myself putting up to three coats on. It's annoying since the product is already so little and when it gets to the end of the tube it’s so hard to get ANY product out. Just from the first use, you feel as if it's come to an end. After a few coats, it dries well and provides a beautiful matte finish. Although the finish is worth it, it takes some time to build up the coverage. This is not recommended for those in a hurry!

Wearability/durability – What this product is famous for other than its variety of shades, is it long wear powers. You can eat, drink and probably even sleep in it and it’ll stay in place! It is very dry and your lips will flake, but as long as you don’t pick at them like I do, the product will not budge! For those who want comfort, this probably isn’t the number 1 choice. It comes off with one swipe of a wipe or micellar water.

Value for money – This is the area that I really can’t make any complaints! It really is cheap and therefore it feels silly to even complain about things like dryness and coats. However, for the little product you get, maybe it’s not 100% the best value for money.

The judgement: 3/5 (this is not a comfortable product but still performs very well for its price), would recommend and will of course repurchase because it too cheap not to!

Written by VavaViolet's Beauty Editor Shalini Chatterjee.


Wednesday, 23 August 2017

The problems with getting engaged young

Just twenty years old, recently engaged, blinged up with a ring, diamond making your Instagram glisten, but what is it really like getting engaged so young?
VavaViolet's Managing Editor Jessica Murray, 20, explores what she thinks the problems are, after recently getting engaged herself.
On my birthday this year, my better half proposed and I must say it was beautiful. So why was I suddenly filled with panic that I would face a lot of backlash for getting engaged at the mere age of 20? It is something I couldn’t prepare for. 
I am the first of my friends to get engaged and my family have been really supportive and are genuinely excited for me but it got me thinking, why is there such a stigma surrounding people getting engaged or being married young?
  1. Will it last? – Now I know what you’re all thinking, it won’t last, it is lust taking control over love. However, I think age doesn’t determine your maturity. If I want to commit at this age to someone for the rest of my life why is it in your interest to remind me that 42% of marriages end in divorce!
  2. Pregnancy – I don’t know how many times I have had to defend myself when picking up a glass of rose. Judgemental eyes peering into your soul with the words ‘should you be drinking that in your condition’, what condition is that please post engagement bliss. I am not pregnant, I am not an irresponsible soon to be mother!
  3. Justification - People are always asking why? I feel like the constant barrage of questions are met with the same wet and boring answer ‘because I love him…’ and that doesn’t seem to ever cut it. Apparently, it isn’t convincing enough that I am willing to only shag one person for the rest of my life, and no, the likelihood is it won’t be the only dick I see until the day I die, I have Tumblr!
  4. Planning - Everyone begins to get slightly excited at the prospect of us actually getting married, but Rome wasn’t built in a day. If you want me to have an incredible day let me plan and do it in my own time. There are so many things to consider before you have to pressure me into putting Auntie Carol on table 10. I have a whole heap of stuff to think about. Venue? Date? Dress? Cake?
  5. Entourage – This is a very fragile time when friends throw themselves at you begging to be a part of the wedding party. No-one realises the stress of trying to narrow down who is going to be part of the team. It is like planning for the masses, everyone is keen but don’t people please, and on a wild night out offer to pay for everyone’s dresses, shoes and accommodation and end up with 150 willing bridesmaids. 
  6. Terrible Two’s -. I hate being described as ‘so-and-so’s fiancée’. I am still a person too, equally so are they. You can still ask about how I am getting on just because we are engaged doesn’t mean we are always together, so him being out for a drink with the boys and me being out with the girls doesn’t mean we are splitting up. Doing everything together constantly may have worked for the Olsen Twins but it doesn’t work for me.
  7. Perfection - No my life isn’t perfect now I have a ring on my finger, arguments don’t magically stop and we both still are individual people with our own thoughts and ideas. Apparently, the ring on my finger meant I had to hang up my rights to have a whine every now and again? Husbands can’t fix things like job problems, elections and the cost of living.
  8. How old are you? – The judgement is always going to be there but realistically, if I was a medieval woman I would have been married and had children by the age of 18 (probably even younger).

Both photos were taken by Kevin Lines. Check out kevin's portfolio for some beautiful shots or if you're looking for a terrific photographer! -

I have no regrets and I don’t believe I ever will, once people get over the initial shock they generally accept it. My grandparents met at 15 and were married at 18 and they have an epic love story, so why can’t that happen now without judgement? This wasn’t a problem for them so I will not allow it to be a problem for me!

Written by VavaViolet's Managing Editor Jessica Murray. 


Monday, 21 August 2017

What to pack for a last minute vacation (all you really need though is highlighter)

The flights are booked, the hotel looks so Insta-worthy and the weather forecast is screaming ‘tan tan tan’, but the hardest bit is yet to come. Packing. 

If you’re like me, this part makes you want to curl up in a corner and cry. The best advice anyone can give you is to ignore that little voice in your head that says, ‘what if I need this’ or ‘I might wear this’. Cancel out all those ‘maybe’ outfits, before you have a one on one with the check in staff about having an overweight suitcase. I’m here to teach you some savvy ways to become the packing pro, whether it’s a city break or it’s a long family get-a-way. 


Let’s start with the most important part. Plan accordingly to the weather. There’s no point in packing that bulky pair of jeans just in case it rains when the whole week is 30 degrees or more when you can fit in a cute romper instead. 

  • Dresses: Always think about the fabric, don’t pack anything too thick and heavy, sway more towards floaty style dresses that you feel comfortable in and still look a strong 10/10.
  • Rompers and Playsuits: These are an easy way to go from beach to bar when it comes to those last-minute ‘dying for a daiquiri’ moments. Patterns and embellishments are always a definite shout that make you feel great with a nice bronze tan. 
  • Shorts: A trusty pair of high waisted Levi’s are a definite must for going anywhere. They give you that rocker look so effortlessly and are easy to pair with absolutely anything. Whether that’s a body suit or a simple t-shirt. Patterned shorts or any type of culottes made from a silky material are always a classy essential to pack. 
  • Pyjamas: Who. Has. The. Time. Or. Patience. It’s far too hot to pack your beloved cotton shirt and trousers, so for the love of god get yourself a nightie. Besides, air conditioning is always an extra cost, so plan ahead of whether you’re strong enough to sweat it out or pay the little bit more to be in Antarctica overnight.   

We are all the biggest suckers for packing your favourite pair of heels for a beach holiday and then when you get there dread the sight of them so you keep them in your suitcase. Dump them. 
  • Sliders, they will change your life. Can you think of anything better than avoiding that inevitable blister when you have to endure the war between sand vs flipflops. Sliders deserve to be on the top of anyone’s packing list. You can get a cheap pair from any high-street store, or you could even treat yourself to a stylish holographic Elesse pair, spend as you please but your feet will worship you. 
  • Dressy flats. A stylish pair of Greek sandals is always on the cards, and Zara will never let you down when it comes to a trendy pair of pointy flats.


I always have an argument with myself about how many bikinis I can buy before its classed as obsessive. My rule is if you’re going for a week, take two, maybe three. That way you can switch it up enough to feel fashionable without overcompensating. 
  • Bikinis: Always start shopping for this as soon as they hit the shops otherwise all you will be left with is an odd set that isn’t available in your size. Another tip is to try on lots of different styles, finding the right one that compliments your figure, and makes you feel confident. If you’re like me and are more on the petite side (even in the boobie area) triangle bikinis will scare the life out of you, so avoid them! Also, make sure they fit you, no one wants to get out the pool and see their undies floating a drift and your bra around your neck. 
  • One pieces: These are all the craze at the minute and are super stylish for that girls holiday you’ve been planning for. They’re also great at hiding that food baby after you’ve hit the all-inclusive buffet too hard. 


Believe me when I say you’re not the only one who panics when buying a £2 travel size bottle of Aussie Shampoo and conditioner thinking ‘how do I stop myself from using it all in the first two days’. However, this is an essential as I don’t think you could convince many people that you’re trying to pull off the ‘wet look’. 
  • Sun cream: Everyone likes to stay safe in the sun, it’s important to protect and look after your skin. You can buy this in airports to save on the baggage but it will be a lot more expensive. 
  • Aftersun: If you’re like me and get cocky on the first day but burn either your bum or boobs, after sun will be your literal life saver. It also helps keep your skin hydrated and makes your tan last longer. 
  • Deodorant: This isn’t allowed in your hand luggage, so I always advise buying a travel size bottle and putting it in your suitcase. 
  • Razors: Disposable ones are always cheap and help you from keeping those stubbly hairs from making an appearance. 
  • Toothbrush and toothpaste: Most common thing people forget, but if you’re clever and pack them, hoorah for you but again, don’t panic as these are available to buy in duty-free. 
  • Small first aid kit: Just in case you get drunk and fall over, these hello kitty plasters will come in handy.
  • Lip Balm with SPF: A combination of sun and air conditioning will make your lips turn into the Sahara desert so having this in your back pocket will keep your lip gloss poppin’. 


Essentials darlings. You will not need your entire makeup drawer with your 247 Morphe pallets and your whole Kylie lip kit collection. All you need is a good mascara, concealer and a popping highlighter to emphasise your gorgeous tan. 

So, get your passports at the ready and hang up your ‘travelling outfit’, as you now should be fully prepared for the long waited and truly deserved break we all need. Now, did someone say Sangria? 

Written by Beth Seabrook.
Follow Beth at:
Twitter - @Beth_havana
Instagram - @Bethhavana

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