Sunday, 1 October 2017

8 things girls go through when flow comes to town

From not being able to open the packaging of a tampon, to crying over it, and then eating five sharing sized bags of Malteasers life can get really bad, real fast. 

I've been on the pill for eight years so like a dog I typically only get a period twice a year (awesome I know) but my body decided to let me bleed to death for 10 days straight last month. So, it reminded me exactly what it's like and the sympathy I have for all women who deal with this sh*t monthly.

These are a few things I personally do/think when on my period, my friends do, and I'm sure most you will nod your head throughout the next eight points.

We throw our diets out of the window
My brain constantly tells me ‘it's okay to eat chocolate/order junk food you're on your period treat yourself’. That's okay if your period lasts three days but if you've been bleeding to death for a week straight the pounds can pile on.

The panicked double check
Either I’m alone and have the memory of a goldfish or periods f*ck with our memories. I’ll take out my tampon and not even a fraction of a second later I’ll go to put a new tampon in and I can't remember if I've taken my tampon out or not. So, I’ll frantically prod myself to try and discover if I've removed it. Of course, because I'm a total idiot this isn't helped by the fact that as soon as I put my tampon in the toilet I flush it so can't even do the toilet check.

Outcomes Mr Spot Cream
After suffering from acne as a young teen I'm now blessed and never get spots but when flow comes into town spots be popping up like unwanted guys in the club. Also, they tend to appear in awkward places like in the middle of your nose, between your brows and the devil itself, the edge of the lip spot. I’ll be slapping on Sudocream like there is no tomorrow.

The granny panties come out to play
We’re not about ruining our Ann Summers thongs or Victoria Secret frenchies so you best believe I'm pulling those Christmas panties over my thighs.

Our sex drives drive us crazy
Yes, our hormones are heightened. Our brains are telling us to breed but our heart is telling us not to ruin the bed sheets.

Talking of crazy
We get moody, teary and will probably snap at you a lot. One minute I’ll be bat sh*t crazy angry and the next the simplest thing like not being able to twist my tampon wrapper open will make me cry. (If you know the struggle of trying to open a tampon wrapper I feel you).

The pain is real
Don't even get me started on the cramps, f*ck me. The hot water bottle, a soft blanket and painkillers are coming out to play.

Feeling the ugliest you’ve ever felt
You know when you sit in the hairdresser’s chair, they put the towel on you, pull your wet hair back and you just stare in the mirror feeling so butt ugly? Yeah, the period feeling is so much worse. You’re bleeding out of your vagina, spots are popping up left right and centre and you have no motivation to do anything from washing your hair to shaving. By the end of my period, I’ll be looking like a Yeti.

Written by VavaViolet's Founder and Editor-in-Chief Sophie Blackman.



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