Friday, 16 March 2018

Advice I’m real glad I didn’t take

I’ve been spoon fed a lot of advice over the years, the majority I’ve taken but some I completely ignored and thank God, I did.

I was advised to get my head down in school (took a while but I did in the end), to quit smoking (again, I took my sweet arse time) and to learn to drive (working on it) but I was also advised to not go into the career I adore, to stay with the guy that I didn’t love anymore and to not sleep with people on the first date.

“Don’t go into journalism if you want to make a lot of money”

It’s no secret that despite the education and exams we have to sit that compared to other careers journalists make f*ck all money. A quick Google search will tell you that the average salary for a reporter is £20-£25K and around £18K annually for a trainee. But do I give a f*ck? Clearly not.

A lot of people told me to aim higher and to train for a job that would eventually see me easily earning over £50K a year and to be completely frank, sure, I could have done that but I don’t think I would have loved my career as much. Being a lawyer was my back up plan if I couldn’t get into journalism which sounds odd because erm hello, that paycheck? But I’m prepared to work my full-time job, freelance and carry on until I’m hitting my goal of bringing in £50K a year.

Yes, it’s a lot of work, it will always be tiring and I sacrifice a lot of social occasions so that I can do all of those things. I’ve only been in the journalism game for shortly under three years so I’m still making contacts and finding my way in the terms of freelancing but I’m also surrounded by people who have been in the industry for a long time who very kindly pass on their knowledge.

I wouldn’t change my choice of career for the world. I love interviewing and meeting people, writing stories, bagging a front page, the thrill of getting hold of a good story is addictive. It’s always challenging and every single day is different.

“Just stay with him, he’s a good guy”

This was a real tough one to not follow. He was a good guy, a true ‘traditional’ gentleman and perhaps one of the nicest, if not the nicest, people I’ve ever met.

I’m not going to go into it but the relationship just didn’t work. I was a coward and dragged the break-up on because so many people were saying to me “you’ll never find a guy like him”, “he treats you amazingly”, “what is wrong with you?”.

It would have been unfair on both of us to stay in a relationship where you’re not 100% invested anymore so I ignored everyone’s advice and pulled the plug. We remained good friends, I wish him nothing but the best and I look forward to the day that he meets someone who will treat him how he deserves because he really does deserve the best.

And if I never meet a guy that treats me as good as he did then that’s better than me getting in the way of his chance with the right person.

“Don’t sleep with him”

A slightly lighter hearted one… Now, admittedly sometimes when my friends have said this to me I have gone on to then regret my actions, ha BUT, a girl got needs.

If I always listened to this advice I wouldn’t have had some cracking experiences. Yes, that is how I view this, don’t judge me. I look forward to being in my 80s, sitting in a care home most likely sh*tting myself whilst giggling at the memory of that guy I hooked up with in a bush or being that drunk aunty on Christmas Day that shares crude stories as the turkey is carved.

I’ve also ignored “don’t sleep with him on the first date” and bloody hell thank God, I did because a relationship where you can’t tell if it’s in or not just isn’t for me.

What are some pieces of advice you’ve ignored? Did it work out for you? Let me know in the comments!

Written by VavaViolet’s Founder and Editor-in-Chief Sophie Blackman.



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