Monday 8 November 2021

The best hook-up I ever had… was with my first ever Tinder match who dominated me beyond belief

After we had both swiped right, little did I know that my sex life was about to change forever and leave me with a thrill I'd never forget.

I had never been on a dating app and never really understood the appeal.

Being a bigger girl dating apps were not on my agenda. I didn't fancy putting up my best pictures for the person I matched with to only be bitterly disappointed when they saw me without a filter. 

I very much appeared a prude to many, but there was a much darker side to me that I was not willing to share until I met him.

It all began when I started university. I had never been on a night out. I had a boyfriend at home that I had been with for two years. I knew that he would not be best pleased with me venturing out on the town with people I had just met, especially boys. 

Still, on my second week of Uni, as I sat down to Skype with him, missing home like crazy, there was a knock at the door. 

"We are going out, no excuses, get ready!", this was Loz* my new neighbour and fellow taken housemate. 

She had a boyfriend, too, which made me feel much safer about going out because although stunningly pretty, I knew that she was very much in love and wasn't the cheating type. 

Due to Loz's* good looks, drinks were flowing all night basically for free and being her friend, cigarette dealer, and general bodyguard meant that I got a free night out too. 

After a fantastic night of dancing, chatting and way too many shots of tequila, we headed home.

I woke up the following day. My head was pounding. "I am never drinking again", I said to myself as I rolled over in bed. 

As I picked up my phone, I was greeted with over 100 text notifications from my boyfriend, who was bitter and mean. 

I had had such a good night, and he had just ruined it by being so nasty. I knew this couldn't go on, so I ended it… I went and sat in our communal kitchen, head pounding in my PJ's and sobbed. 

Honestly, I loved him so much, but I wasn't willing to put either of us through the long-distance thing. It was time to focus on myself.

Sobbing as if my life was over, I must have been louder than I thought, and Loz came in… looking rather upset herself. 

"Not you too," I gasped. 

She slumped down on the sofa next to me and, as she welled up, said, "Fuck boys, we need men!".

From this point on, we hit the gym… hard. Tried to reduce our takeaway intake but being a student, the free Cheeseburger with a meal was far too appealing. Still, we were happy, free and single, and we got each other through it. 

One night, Loz* was sitting scrolling on her phone, giggling to herself, "what are you up to?" I asked. 

"Tinder", she replied, "You've got to download it. Some of these chat-up lines are hilarious."

Reluctant at first, I thought, what have I got to lose? I never have to meet these guys, or it might push me out of my comfort zone. So, I started scrolling. 

Loz* and I would exchange funny bios that we had heard and laugh when we matched the same people. 

She would take my phone and swipe for me, and I would do the same for her. It was all lighthearted fun, and no one had ever really messaged me back and then ping….

"Hey, how are you?" 

That's how it began with him.

He was not my type, and by that, I mean he was so painfully out of my league that I thought this must have been a joke by some of his friends.

One day Loz* announced that she was leaving Uni, and I was gutted. 

We had gone through so much together, but in time I got a lovely new housemate. She was quiet and somewhat judgmental (especially of sex), but I didn't mind as I had him to keep me company.

Months passed of chatting, and we knew so much about each other, but it was so refreshing that sex had never really come about or been spoken about.

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It was hinted at for sure, and the conversation was extraordinarily flirtatious but nothing seedy. 

By six years, he was older than me, which was a big gap, but it felt like nothing to us.

"Fancy meeting up?" he asked one night out of the blue at 10pm.

"What now!" I replied instantly. How could I not?

"Yeah, why not be spontaneous, and I'll make it worth the trip," the charm did it for my much younger self. 

All my rational nature went out of the window. "Sure, I am on my way."

The hour trip to pick him up from his felt like it took two days, and as I pulled up to his house, my nerves had well and truly kicked in. 

I was physically shaking and felt sick. 

As he came to the door, I finally could appreciate that he was very tall, muscly and his blue eyes smiled at me. I just knew I needed him in every way possible. 

The drive back to mine felt like it flew, and we sang duets in the car and just acted like childish fools. As soon as the keys went into my front door, however, things suddenly became very adult!

My heart was beating hard as he pushed up against me in the hallway. 

I had avoided eye contact for the most part of the journey. Still, I knew from his photos that he was devilishly handsome. 

When I finally caught his eye line, after he slapped my arse… hard, before I knew it, we were kissing.

The living room curtains were wide open, and although it was dark out, anyone could have been watching. I reached to pull the curtains as he pulled me back and almost growled at me. 

Anything he asked of me, I obeyed without question. 

He grabbed me by the throat and pulled my hair. It was like nothing I had experienced before. The new and overwhelming desire to please engulfed me, and at that point, I would have done anything he asked me to. 

He took me upstairs, and before we knew it, things were progressing more and more rapidly. 

I didn't realise how loud I was being, but I couldn't help myself. Every part of my body was shaking, begging, and pleading with him not to stop. 

He bent me over the bed and entered without any hesitation, which felt like a shock. He was the first person I had ever been with who treated me this way, and to many, it may have seemed overwhelming, but it was the most incredible rush to me. 

As we both climaxed, it was almost surreal to me as in the two years with my previous partner, I had never had that feeling ever. 

After it was over, I went and had a shower, and when I came back in, he had laid out my PJ's, put on a movie and put his arm out to hug me. 

It went back to how it had been in the car, a fleeting moment of intensity followed by the aftercare that I never knew I needed. 

My housemate, who wasn't supposed to be home that night but was, said she had prayed for me after what she had heard. I didn't even know she was home. 

All I know is in the year that followed, she could not look me in the eye again, and if I told her he was coming over, she never seemed to go home.

Names have been changed throughout this article. 

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